Do you get emotional when your child cries at pediatric visits?

“Oh my poor baby, please don’t cry. I cannot see you this way”. This is a pretty common phrase that you get to hear from teary eyed parents in pediatric clinics. Visit to a pediatrician can be very stressful and emotionally challenging not only for the child but also for parents, as they have to handle their fussy kid and simultaneously interact with the doctor.  Although stressful, these visits are unavoidable, at least during the first few years of parenthood. The key to stress free and smooth pediatric visit is keeping the child calm and comfortable.  This would indirectly de-stress the parents. Here are a few suggestions that you could keep in mind while taking your kid to the pediatrician.

1. The Basic Step, Choose the Pediatrician Wisely: We as parents are so apprehensive about our little one’s well being that we select a pediatrician even before our kid is born. This is indeed required as the child’s health needs are to be taken care of right from the time of birth. Select a good pediatrician who is nearby. Kids are very vulnerable and God forbid you might have to rush them to the doctor in case of an emergency or at odd hours, so the pediatrician should be within easy reach. This would also prove quite convenient during the first year of birth where, the kids have periodic vaccinations and thus, frequent visits.

2. Timing does matter: Do not reach the clinic much before your scheduled appointment. Kids generally cry when they see other kids weeping. So, always arrive only a few minutes before the appointment in order to avoid such emotional fallouts. For follow ups and routine check-ups, choose an appropriate appointment time when the kid is well fed and is not sleepy.

3. The Emotional quotient: It is very likely that your kid would cry and many times uncontrollably, during such visits, due to (i)his heath condition, (ii) due to anxiety pertaining to changed surrounding, the doctor and the physical examination, (iii) due to treatment pain like getting flu shots and (iv) seeing other kids cry. Watching your kid cry can be emotionally exhausting.  So what do you do as a parent? Does your heart melt and you breakdown? If yes, you are making your little one more miserable, as your tears make his conviction stronger that something is not right and the doctor is doing some harm to him. On the other hand, if you keep calm in spite of the emotional turmoil that you feel inside yourself your kid would soon be at ease. Here, you need to keep reminding your child that things are fine; the treatment is for his own good and he is getting better.

4. Carry Some Goodies: Always take your kids favorite toy or whatever he likes to play with during visits so that he can be easily distracted whenever he is feeling uncomfortable.

5. Watch Your Words: While comforting your child always be cautious about what you utter. Never console him by saying, “Oh! The doctor was unpleasant with you, bad, we will get even with him”. This would give an impression that that the doctor harmed him, and would foster the feeling of aversion and uneasiness in his mind towards the doctor. Another common mistake that parents commit is to instill fear about injection shot in order to get things done their way. For example, I noticed a parents calling out to their child “Eat this, otherwise you will get an injection prick”. Such remarks might get things done your way but would sow the seeds of fear and anxiety in the tender heart.

6.  Hygiene and Sanitation: Always follow the basic cleanliness and sanitation routine during and after pediatric visits so that your child does not catch another infection from the clinic nor transfer his infection to some other kid. This is especially important for new born and infants who are inherently low in immunity.

  • Always carry a washable sheet/ Disposable Changing Matfor spreading on the examination table, before you lay your kid for physical check up.
  • Wash and sanitize hand after pediatric visit
  • The pediatrician may have kept toys in the common waiting area. Do not let your kid put any of those toys especially soft toys in their mouth. These toys are one of the biggest sources of infection, since children with all kind of health issues come and play with them and might accidently contaminate the toys with their infection. Your kid may take up a secondary infection or transfer his infection in those toys.

7. The Prep Work: You will have to multitask (handle kid, your emotion and simultaneously interact with the peaditrician) during such visits. Therefore, make a mental note of all the points that you want to discuss, so that you do not miss any of the questions/doubts pertaining to your kids health.

8. Role Play: Get a toy doctor set and play doctor-doctor with your child at home. Enact how the pediatrician would carry out the physical examination. Let learning and play go side by side.

9. After the visit: The next herculean task after visit is to administer the prescribed medicine to the kid. This has to be done tactfully especially with older toddler’s as they are most prone to rejecting medicines, even spilling them or vomiting out if given by force. The best method I have found is to use a medicine dropper. You can easily administer liquids up to 10ml. Just fill the dropper, put the medicine in the cheek pocket, and lo! There is no spillage or vomiting.

The above methods worked for me, you could try these and see if they work for you and your little one. Do share your experience in the comments section.

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That last exam

How was your sports day? Sonam asked, her five year old son. She was on the way to attend a marriage function. Sitting in the car, all decked up, she was giving final touches to her makeup and chatting with her son. She was a busy woman, an accomplished scientist by profession, striving to strike a perfect work life balance. Her son replied “Main race mein first aaya (I won the race). One of the boys was ahead of me I pushed him; he fell, and I ran towards victory”. Sonam put down her lipstick and frowned “why did u push the other kid? Read more below

You can also read this article at:
https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/nurturing-little-humans/article/that-last-exam-amwriting

Five type of books that are best for infants and toddlers

Books are your best friends and it is good to inculcate the habit of reading in children from early age. Here are a few books that I loved and have bought it for my baby. They are good for infants and toddlers. Early on kids love large pictures, music and different texture books and not much of text so these books have been selected accordingly.

I am also posting the link for the books as well.


1. Cloth books: Good for infants, as they like to put everything in their mouth.
My choice: baby touch snuggle cloth book. https://amzn.to/2MjfiAr


2. Sound Books: Would come handy for babies 6 months onwards.
My choice: Peppa Pig: Peppa’s Super Noisy Sound Book https://amzn.to/2MiSzES
Fisher Price; Laugh and Learn Storybook Rhymes https://amzn.to/2MiSNvI


3. Texture books: Helps kids identify different textures like smooth, rough, rubbery etc.
My choice: Baby Touch: Flip-Flap Book https://amzn.to/2N6AaL4
Baby touch: Peekaboo https://amzn.to/2TzLgcr


4. Board Books: Good for naughty toddlers. They will not be able to tear them. Good for learning names of fruits, vegetables, birds, animals etc
My choice: My First Library: Boxset of 10 Board Books for Kids https://amzn.to/2KPW56x


5. Jumbo Books: As the name says; big in size so large pictures, kids would easily identify the characters.
My choice: Fairy Tales (My Jumbo Book) https://amzn.to/2Mk9kPM
Aesop’s Fables (My Jumbo Book) https://amzn.to/31JMdlh

#babybooks #bookrecommendation #book #parenting #parenthood #

When u “THINK” u are teaching….

STOP IT!! This was the fifth time I was asking my daughter not to touch the glass flowerpot. I along with my daughter had gone to visit one of my college friends. We were meeting after a long time and I was looking forward to spending some time with her over a cup of tea. As we were chit chatting my daughter’s attention was drawn to the glass flowerpot lying on the side table. She wanted to grab it and play with it. Since, it was a glass pot so I told her not to touch it. But,

 KIDS are KIDS!!

She did not listen. She was fanatical about taking it. Every time she went for it, I told her “No baby, don’t touch it”. Nevertheless, she refused to budge. On the contrary, she became more fussy and almost reached the pot. Again, I pulled her back, this time with some force. She started crying and even banged her head on the sofa.

My temper shot up with every attempt she made to grab the pot. I even shouted at her which made her cry louder. I was furious at her misbehavior. A hundred thoughts crossed my mind during that time. “What will my friend think of my daughter?” “Have I failed as a parent?”  “She has not learned anything about behavior”. In a bout of anger, I again scolded my daughter and told her not to go for the pot. But, she was uncontrollable, inconsolable, stubborn and crying relentlessly.

Now, the situation was going out of control. Scolding her was not helping. I started thinking of other ways to calm her. Now it was not about what my friend would think of my daughter or me.

NOW, IT WAS ABOUT MY KID,

My dear daughter, whom I love the most in the world and I had to calm her. I took a deep breath, relaxed myself and smiled. I asked her “Do u want that flower pot?” She nodded “yes”. I smiled again, took her in my arms, and went near the flowerpot. I just let her gently place her hand on the pot and politely whispered in her ear. “This is very fragile; it might break if we touch it harder”. She calmed down a bit and listened very attentively to what I was saying. I continued, “Where will aunty keep flowers if this pot breaks?” Now she was thoughtful and nodded in affirmation. Then I immediately distracted her saying “Baby look! there is a sparrow outside. Let’s go and see”. Saying this I took her to the nearby window and she happily started looking for a sparrow.

We stayed at my friends place for some time and then returned home. On the way back, I introspected about what had happened earlier. How my little one, who at one point of time was so furious and adamant suddenly became calm and settled for just a gentle touch on the pot. Rewinding the whole incident, I analyzed that

it was my SMILE THAT CHANGED HER MOOD. 

She was behaving the same way as I was. Until the time I was furious, she was fussy. When I smiled, she also relaxed. She was following me in all the ways. That incident became learning for me. I realized that kids look up to their parents for inspiration. They follow them and learn the basics of life, behavior and everything from their parents. Kids learn by observation and during early years of life their parents surround them most of the time. Therefore, parents become their ideal for learning everything. So, whatever you do, your kid will observe and grasp some part of it. I contemplated, that instead of getting angry on my dear daughter, I should have calmly explained to her why I was not allowing her to touch the pot and should have used some method to engage my fussy kid and I took her to the window to watch birds. That day though, I was trying to teach my daughter how to behave and control her anger, it happened the other way round; she taught me a life lesson instead.  As a parent;

BE THE EXAMPLE TO WHATEVER YOU WANT YOUR KIDS TO BE.”

When Toys Fail: Ten Ways to Engage Fussy Babies

The joy a little one brings in your life, is something that cannot be described in words, but can only be experienced. Preparations for welcoming the new member of the family begin right from the day you realize that you are expecting. Nine months of pregnancy happily pass anticipating the arrival of cute little bundle of joy. During pregnancy, you tend to think that all the pain and discomfort would end, once you deliver the baby. But, beware!! The real test is yet to come. Raising a child is a big responsibility and doing it the right way is even more important.

I have a cute little daughter, who is so dear to me. She is the sunshine of my life. But, on the flip side she was a cry baby in the first year of her birth. Many a times, she was neither colicky, nor hungry and neither sleepy but fussy; which meant she always demanded attention and had to be engaged in something or the other. My husband and I got her many toys but they were good for only a few minutes and thereafter we would be back to square one.  It was then, that I started thinking and exploring other ways to manage my fussy kid. She is a year old now, and during the past one year, as I interacted with other moms, I realized that this is a very common behavior in babies. So, I decided to share a few ideas that I used to handle my little one from one month of age to about the time she was one year. These activities not only were helpful to engage her but also were good for her development and well-being.

White Noise: It mimics the sounds the babies hear in the womb; like sound of mother’s heart and her gastric movements. So, it reminds the infant of the familiar environment she was in and thus, calm her. Your naughty infant might also fall asleep listening to this. White noise videos are easily accessible on YouTube.

Hand and Finger Movements: During the early months of life, infants cannot see very clearly. However, their hearing ability is well developed. So, a simple clap will draw their attention. A clap followed by snapping your fingers or any other haphazard finger or hand movement would engage her for quite some time.

Tummy time: Roll the baby on her tummy. You can use a pillow to secure and support her head until the time her neck becomes steady. My breast feeding pillow came handy for this activity. I started giving tummy time to my little one when she was about 6 weeks old. American Association of Pediatrics recommends tummy time should be given to newborn babies. Start with a few minutes and you can go up to 20 minutes. This activity will amuse her as she would be able to explore the world around her from a different angle and also, strengthen her neck and back muscles. Lying on stomach also improves digestion. But never practice this when the baby has just been fed and is full stomach. You can make tummy time more interesting by placing a mirror in front of the baby.

Peek-a-boo: This is something even I loved as a kid. Early on babies are learning what is called ‘object permanence’, which means that things do exist even when they cannot see them. Gently place a handkerchief or your hand on the babies face then take it off. But make sure you do not place the cloth for too long as it might suffocate the child.

Picture album: Once your little one learns to sit upright, create a colorful picture album with photos of family and friends. She would love seeing familiar faces while flipping the pages of the album.

Large print books: This is one of my favorites. Babies love turning pages and finding new colorful objects. It is in a way like picture album but with a different learning. Early on, you can get Cloth Books, which work as a book as well as a teether as infants love exploring everything from their mouth. At about six months, Sound Books musical books can also come handy. Thereafter, you can go for board books. Personally, I liked ” My First Learning Library: Boxset of 20 Board Books for Kids by Wonder House Books” for my kid. It has books on animals, birds, fruits, vegetables etc. Essentially, it includes everything that your child needs to learn at this stage. Say out aloud while pointing out different things shown in the book.  This would improve your toddler’s vocabulary and also encourage him to speak. Books are also a good way to keep your child away from mobile phones. Other books that I found good for my little one include texture books. An inside tip: Babies love looking at other babies so any book which has pictures of babies would really interest your little one.

Crayons: Drawing and coloring is something you and your child can do together. It is a good way to re-live your childhood and to further strengthen the beautiful bond to that you both share. Older toddlers, can happily sit with paper, pen or caryons and draw their own ‘line art’. You can encourage them towards this hobby by drawing simple objects, which the child recognizes in daily life like flowers, ball or a bird.

Let the kid be messy: While, this does increase your work but it is sometimes ok to let them do whatever they want. Even if it is banging kitchen utensils, unfolding toilet roll, messing up the wardrobe, spreading food all around themselves, or tear a news paper. This gives them a sense of freedom and let them explore the world their way. You may also follow what our moms and grandmas did with us as children. Let your kid be in kitchen while you cook. Give her some finger food, a spoon or a bowl. The kid enjoys while you work.  

Water activity: This idea would work if your child loves taking bath and enjoys playing in water. Buy a small swimming pool, some bath toys and let your child enjoy with water. But do keep a watch and never leave the child alone in water.

A trip to the garden: This I consider as the ‘magic wand’ and works on most of the kids. When nothing else works, take your kid out for a walk in the garden. Your child will miraculously transform from a ‘cry baby’ to a ‘happy angel’.

Lastly, always trust your motherly instincts. You know best what your child needs. When nothing works, it is your motherly touch, which would calm the baby, make her happy and give a sense of security. Also, remember, kids learn a lot by observation. A mother is child’s first ‘Guru’.  Behave the way you want your child to be. Happiness begets happiness, anger begets anger. Your little one will respond to the kind of emotion you show. Motherhood demands a lot of patience and sacrifice. However, a little smile on your babies face will make you forget all the hardships that you face in raising your child. Make the most of this beautiful time, cherish the bond with your child. It would be soon that your child would grow up and be independent.

Do post your comments about the content and other ways you follow to engage your kid.